grossly sincere

When you think of something (or someone) sexy, your mind may conjure up imagery of black lace on glimmering skin, leaving little to the imagination, or a sultry scent that reminds you of being inches away from another hot body. It could remind you of the intimate moments between you and a lover, of the way their breath catches when you kiss them in the right places, or the look in their eyes from across the room, begging you to come closer.

This 2026, we’re going to be Sexy.

Did that get you hot and bothered? I hope it did. But this isn’t going to be about that kind of sexiness—at least, not entirely about that kind of sexiness.

SEXY 2026 is going to be about four main values to live by: Sensitivity, Effort, eXcellence, and Youthfulness. (the X is sort of cheating, but sometimes.. you have to make do.)

You may be wondering what I mean by this, or how any of these listed values relate to being sexy at all. Though words like “sexy” can be given a rigid definition in a dictionary, words take on their own meaning through the varying contexts they are used in. They retain their original meaning, but are transformed by the mouths they travel through, and where those mouths travel. The same will be done with the word “sexy” by the end of 2026 (but also through this very blog post, of course).

To start redefining the word “sexy,” our first tenet of SEXY 2026 is sensitivity. Sensitivity will be absolutely vital to navigating this new year within this system I’ve proposed. We must be acutely aware of the world we live in, the people we relate to, and of our own existence.

Doing this will give us a clear map of where we are heading. Whether it is to explore yourself emotionally, physically, or mentally, clarity through self-examination is something to strive for. In other words, we must be a little more pensive this year. We must challenge ourselves more. We must think more deeply and give more serious thought to our words and actions.

While this heightened awareness of everything sounds like a recipe for a nervous breakdown.. or, perhaps normal to those with chronic anxiety.. with sensitivity, we must also be able to practice discernment—which, I think is another word for sensitivity, really.

At the same time, sensitivity does not just end at the individual. While self-concern is part of growth, being sensitive to those that are Other to us, whether stranger or friend, show us parts of the world we may not be able to see by ourselves. This is not a warning or call for defense, but this kind of awareness of others and their experiences is vital for building relationships.

On a broader level, practicing sensitivity requires a recognition of the individual’s place in the world, and with that, recognizing how others may not be in the same place. We must recognize ourselves in comparison to others, and use discernment to foster connection or aid, or sometimes to even break connections. In other words, sensitivity/discernment is not just for personal gain—it can also be used as a tool for removal.

With all that being said, what does practicing sensitivity look like? Well, one cannot fully practice SEXY 2026 without one of its sisters.

To practice sensitivity, it is essential to put in effort. Gone are the days when we call it a day after a half-hearted attempt. No more leaving things unfinished after a swell of excitement, no more leaving people or places when things don’t go as planned, no more abandoning something for fate to capture in its claws. We will have none of it. This year, we are going to give our all, all the time.

To do this, you must hearken back to our first value, sensitivity, to guide you. Being wary of your values, situation, environment, all such things, can point you towards where you might benefit from putting more consideration, time, and energy into something. Of course, we can think of effort as something practical, like deciding to actually use all the groceries you buy instead of letting them rot in the fridge, or putting in more reps during your workout. But practicality in this sense is not enough for 2026. We must expand the scope of practicality to what is essential for those passionate enough to take on the world’s challenges…

In other words, effort is a tenet of SEXY that requires a strong constitution. It asks you to confront the possibility of rejection and disappointment and consistently choose to act against it. Tend to wilting flowers, tell someone dear that you’re upset, wipe away the tears from someone’s spilled milk, and then clean up the milk after. These are all things that require one to put in a great deal of effort. It is the physical and emotional labor required to live a life where you can belly laugh on the couch, sob and dry heave as tears stream down your face, and cackle in the face of evil.

A consistent choice to practice effort tests one’s integrity and can even trump an unsatiable ambition. However, to truly begin practicing this value for 2026, you must become comfortable with the idea of commitment. If effort alone seems intimidating, then you’re in for a real scare with this commitment business. The beauty of commitment is that it can easily become devotion. Adoration. It offers ritual, stability, and comfort. These are mostly things for the individual, but commitment—and this is why people are so scared of it—can deepen relationships with others, too. That sounds obvious, but I think it should be spelled out for some people with an example that pulls at your heart. Outside of relationships, there are even legal consequences to a lack of commitment. It’s obviously a very important thing to do… but enough of that.

Deciding to put in effort means that you are rejecting regret and disappointment. Those feelings are certainly unpleasant, but they can be prevented and remedied if you resolve to consistently try and try again. Effort is proof that you are resilient.

With effort in mind, we know that it pays off. But what happens when you put in effort? What’s the point of trying over and over again?

The answer to that is our next member of SEXY: excellence (again, I’m sorry for the stretch for this acronym. But it’s a good lineup after effort.) And what we want in 2026 is to be the best of the best. All this effort will lead us to success, inevitably.

But what is excellence, if not success? What is.. success, then?

Like many things, as we’ve discussed, success can look like a lot of different things. Perhaps your efforts in the workplace lead you to a promotion, or your academic efforts get you on the Dean’s List, or something like that. Those are just a couple ways that excellence shows itself and is measured. After meeting meticulous standards and specifications, you do achieve excellence in that context.. but you may question what you’re left with after it all.

This is where you truly find out if you’ve achieved excellence or not. When you have truly achieved excellence, the effort you put in does not dwindle.

That sounds a little harsh, doesn’t it? All that effort, and all you get is a silly little plaque with your name on it? Is that all you amount to? And is that the point of effort, to be rewarded?

No, that’s not what this is about. What I’m trying to say is, true excellence, in the spirit of SEXY 2026, cannot be achieved unless effort is put into all aspects of your life, rather than just one. Effort and excellence go hand in hand—you can’t have one without the other. Excellence is achieved through a conscious effort to do better and be better for your own sake. It’s about fulfillment, and how can one be satisfied when you may be lacking in another area? Why lack in another area, or.. how could you, if you’re dedicated to being SEXY?

These are just some of the questions you must continue to ask yourself to have a SEXY 2026. While it seems like a lot to uphold in practice, our next contender in SEXY should make this effort and excellence come easy.. or, I hope it does.

Our last tenet of SEXY is youthfulness. What does this mean, exactly…?

Doing this doesn’t exactly mean you should be hip to new slang/music/pop culture. The desperate clutching onto youthfulness might come from a place of being insecure about aging.. which, if you are afraid or self-conscious about getting older, that’s fine. But.. you just need to accept it. It is absolutely essential to accept your maturity with this aspect of SEXY.. otherwise, you might end up larping as a 20-year-old version of yourself, 6 years later.

Though youthfulness in this sense is indeed about carrying your youth along with you, it requires you to accept all your life experience until this point. One cannot practice youthfulness without having the experience and maturity to look back in time and find what you want to practice in the present.

I think the idea of being young again is so enticing because we look back on the past with the knowledge we have now, wishing we could have done something different, or wishing we could have better appreciated what once was. Whatever choice it was that we’d like to redo, we must accept it is in the past. That is what practicing youthfulness is about.

In other words, the youthfulness of SEXY is about acceptance—being able to accept what has already happened, what is happening now, and the coming future.

There you have it. That’s what SEXY 2026 is about. It may seem overwhelming, or even tedious, but these are the values I want to move forward with this year.

Like I mentioned at the beginning of this.. discussion, words take on multiple meanings through the contexts they are used in. In its literal definition, “sexy” means appealing to sexual arousal. Duh. But my choice of the word “sexy” as an acronym was not solely for laughs—intrigue, yes—but what I really want is for people to recognize the traits and values across SEXY as important, or at least, something to think about.